Well, after being up for an hour yesterday, it appears like we’re now permanently back online. Permanently in the sense that it’s utterly impermanent I’m sure. But whatever. I also made a fun new Tumblr that is an idea that may quickly become more successful than this blog. Which would kind of make me sad, but whatever. And conveniently enough, immediately after making that blog, this one came back up. Jealous much, Blog of Hilarity?

Real posts coming soon.

Smooches,
Chris
Your Paragon of Virtue

So I literally just got into the office after an hour and a half car ride from JFK. Wanted to stop in though so you know that yes, your Paragon of Virtue has returned. I’m sleepy and hungry and ready to say mean things about people before I pass out in a heap under my desk at 3PM. Goooo Team Chris!

Smooches,
Chris
Your Paragon of Virtue

Yes, I’m posting this at like 5:45AM Eastern. Shoot me in the fucking face. Anyway, a last minute trip to Florida for my new job has come up and I’m not sure I’m going to be able to squeeze in any posts. I’ll see if I can but, in all likelihood, probably back posting regularly sometime in the afternoon on Thursday. Pretend you miss me.

Smooches,
Chris
Your Paragon of Virtue

So yeah, dear reader your fears have been allayed. Presumably, the fears that I would be forced to make this blogging thing a full-time job.

I am a gainfully employed man again beginning May 12. Theoretically that has nothing to do with you (though if you’re reading what I have to say every day here, you should be rooting for my successes. Perhaps over your own). But it does! I’m leaving town for like a week. I will probably pop in here and there but not with my usual frequency. So let’s say, for all intents and purposes, I’m out of here til next Wednesday.

Read the archives, check out the sites on the blogroll, maybe check here once a day to see if I said hi and called someone gay/fat/a racial epithet; do what you have to do to get by without the countless minutes a day I distract from your existence. As the colored gentlemen I saw in the Bronx today say: “Word.”

Smooches,
Chris
Your Paragon of Virtue

Sooo that personal reasons I mentioned on Friday is that your intrepid editor is going to be leaving his place of employment. What that means, in the short term, is ramping up the efforts on this blog.

So what does that mean to you, handsome/beautiful person with an advertising budget? It means that I’m completely willing to whore myself out to you for money. If you want to be seen by thousands of people riveted by my every word, you can buy out some of my ad inventory. Email my ad sales department (which may or not consist of me wearing a glued on handlebar mustache) at ads@blogofhilarity.com.

This is your chance to get in on the ground floor of me actually putting effort into my work! If I’m this successful with my half-assed writing, imagine how great I’ll be with 5 minutes of preparation!

Smooches,
Chris
Your Paragon of Virtue Unless Money Is Involved