Dec.04.2008 What to do with your fingers
Via Explosm.net comes this important lesson about vaginas and magic.
She’s probably freaked out now, but he just saved himself a whole lot of trouble down the line. Nothing can ruin a sexy moment faster than a bunny rabbit mistaking your penis for a carrot during intercourse. Trust me.
Find the Jonas Brothers Tour Dates and Madonna Tour Dates at Vividseats.com! We sell Concert Tickets like Avril Lavigne Concert Tickets and Theater Tickets to the hottest shows, such as The Lion King and Wicked.
Dec.03.2008 The December 3 Hot Link Orgy
The hottest orgy with bears
Trust no bear. An important lesson this woman learned.
***Hey, so I still want people to join our Facebook fan page. There’s really nothing worthwhile on it now but I’d like to have all of my most favorite readers on it (or at least get the group to 100 people). So help me out and join here. Maybe there’ll be a prize or something, I don’t know. Just do it!!!!
-College girl sells sex for money but still finds herself to be classy
-Adorable freaking cat plays dead (awwwww video)
-Victoria’s Secret model sunbathes naked
-What an awful family picture (funny pic)
-I have a thing for hot chicks wearing nothing but body paint
-The hottest gadget gifts for this holiday season (useful information)
-A Hitler freestyle rap (funny video)
-Great moments in Internet dating (funny video)
-Young boy SUCKS at gymnastics (funny video)
-Is college girls looking for sugar daddies the hot new trend? If so, time for me to put a $20 bill in the front of my pants and head to NYU
-Aya Kiguchi is another hot Asian who kinda looks like an awesome anime character (awesome because of breasts)
-Eliza Dushku is just incredibly hot, especially in a bikini
-My pal Don Chavez is giving away a fuckload of stuff (about $2k worth) this holiday so check it out…in related news, I’m giving away good intentions
-12 of the best kids’ show/rap mashups (like that Lil Jon/Lazytown one I posted the other day…funny videos)
-The 15 funniest Family Guy moments ever (videos, of course)
-Sarah Coggin is a hot girl next door in a see-through shirt
-The LEGO miniman turned 30 this week. Reports of him fucking a 19 year-old minicoed are unconfirmed
-The 15 hottest sister pairings around
-10 great fat guy moments in sports (awesome video collection)
-The 5 weirdest Kool-Aid ads ever (awesome funny video)
Dec.01.2008 Quote of the Day
The recession is making it difficult for people to find activities to entertain themselves. Well, not in the UK as sex is now becoming a popular free activity. And you can make money off of it if you’re cute enough and have no standards as to what is going to be inserted inside of you and what monster it may be attached to!
As the credit crunch bites, Britons may be turning to sex as a cheap way to pass the time, a charity says.
A YouGov survey of 2,000 adults found sex was the most popular free activity, ahead of window shopping and gossiping.
[via]
Nov.21.2008 Finally a place to take the family
At last, here’s a scientific endeavor I can get behind!
This is from an old issue of LIFE, whose entire archives are now available on Google. Apparently it was a strip club or something. And I dig that because it’s different than all the other names. Sure, you’ve got your Spearmint Rhinos and Peppermint Hippos and Junior Mint Giraffecunts. But it takes a real classy place to have the name Institute of Oral Love. That’s not just a strip club. It’s a research facility based around the basic principles that men will pay money to see women’s vaginas and have their orifices do something to their genitals (something that lazy prick Isaac Newton conveniently avoided doing a theory on).
Anyway, the point is, I wish this place still existed as a training grounds based on its name. Not to name any names, but some ex girlfriends of mine might want to book themselves a three week stay at this Institute instead of the institutions I found them at. If you try to fuck a crazy girl in the ass but tell her it’ll keep the aliens from listening to her thoughts, more often than not, you’ll win!
Nov.19.2008 Kid charged with sexual battery for hugging a social worker
Kids love hugs from strangers. It’s science, at least according to NAMBLA. But a junior high kid might be charged with sexual battery for hugging a school social worker.
A junior high school student could be charged with sexual battery after allegedly giving a school social worker an “inappropriate” hug, MyFOXKC.com reported.
The employee at Chisholm Trail Junior High School told an assistant principal that the 13-year-old boy embraced her in a way that made her uncomfortable, according to police in Olathe, Kan.
A school official contacted the boy about the incident and then released him to his parents, but the local prosecutor is weighing whether to file charges, according to MyFOXKC.com.
“The incident was documented and it has been forwarded to the district attorney’s office,” said Olathe Police Sgt. Johnnie Rowland. “They will review it and decide from that point what action should be taken.”
It’s kind of absurd to charge the kid. In all seriousness, I would guess that the kid hugged her from behind, perhaps had a little teenage erection (or large, depending upon what area of town this is, if you catch my drift) and probably lingered a little long. In which case we should probably applaud this kid for knowing how to seduce a woman at such a young age. Or revile him for getting more action than you have in the past month.
I hope that’s what happened, because that hug would have to be unbearably inappropriate for this to make any sense. I’m talking like a full-on hug that left yogurt stains on her dress. Or the kind of hug I used to get at Boy Scouts that got me my Good at Keeping a Secret badge.
[source]
Nov.17.2008 The November 17 Hot Link Orgy
The hottest orgy with ceilings
Spiderman is using his powers for evil
-The hottest Hooters waitress in all of Wisconsin
-The week in breasteseses
-Beyonce shows the goods in German GQ
-What are the coolest places to have sex? (worth it for the first comment alone)
-The 10 hottest celebrity female dominatrix scenes (w/ videos, of course)
-Hot sideline reporter finds ways to make herself hotter
-The Kardashians show off their bikinis
-Farabe Cottingham has long legs and fuckme boots
-Tina O’Brien looks good in lingerie
-Every image you need from the Victoria’s Secret fashion show
-Good advice goes bad in this skit with the dude from Will and Grace (funny video)
-The top 20 wrestling moves that sound like sex acts
-Stacy Keibler gives the Meow Mix cat a boner (funny pic)
-The top 50 basketball commercials of all time
-Funny sexual moments in video games (funny video)
-More funny overheard college quotes
-Worst translation fail EVER (funny pic)
Oct.31.2008 Fat girls more likely to have sex than non-fatties
A new study has shaken the foundations of science and sexuality, primarily due to the shift of fat women rushing to hand in their surveys. A new study shows that fat chicks are more likely to be getting laid than thin ones.
Overweight women are more likely to report having sex with men than women considered to be of “normal weight,” U.S. researchers said.
The study is based on data from the 2002 National Survey of Family Growth, which looked at sexual behavior of more than 7,000 U.S. women.
“These results were unexpected and we don’t really know why this is the case,” Kaneshiro said in a statement.
Ninety-two percent of overweight women reported having a history of sexual intercourse with a man, as opposed to 87 percent of women with a normal body mass index.
In fairness, BMI is kind of a dumb way of measuring if someone’s fat or not. If a girl has great big sexy boobs, she’ll probably be over her recommended BMI too. And, as we all know, every attractive woman with big breasts is a complete whore. I can’t accept that porn’s lied to me over the years, it would destroy my whole world view.
But yeah, let’s assume that this really is about real fat women. Like fat women whom you could see and go, “Wait, that thing is a person? I just assumed you were a pile of mashed potatoes that gained autonomy and a willingness to move.” If that’s the case, and I pray to all the gods that it isn’t, then I am ashamed for all of you. Yes, we’ve all wanted to fuck the Michelin Man at some point in our lives. Doesn’t make it right.
