Dec.01.2008 The December 1 Hot Link Orgy
The hottest orgy with scrotal torture
A good way to mock your friend’s weakness in the gym: Making him kill himself by punching him in the groin while he does the bench press
-How to start a conversation with a random hot chick
-This Cleveland Cavaliers cheerleader is in a bubble bath with her lady friend
-Awesome collection of “Demotivational Posters” (funny pics)
-Holly Valance is Australian hotness
-The Monopoly man has gone bankrupt (funny video)
-What could have happened with your girlfriend at Thanksgiving (funny video)
-Awesome college classes you wish you could have taken
-Drunk Santa Clauses chasing half-naked Hooters girls? Of course it’s in Jersey
-Scarlett Johansson looks hot in the new movie The Spirit
-An extremely thorough guide to all of the celebrity sex tapes floating around (with videos, of course)
-All the old Lara Croft real life models (sexyyyy)
-It’s probably not fair how hot Jennifer Walcott is
-The 6 most inappropriate porn character occupations
-A tribute to awful ass tattoos (funny pic gallery)
-NBA Hot or Not (ranking teams by hot lady)
-Americans <3 guns (funny videos)
-Big boobed girls in bikinis play on a slip and slide (the most compelling video you can ever see)
Find the Jonas Brothers Tour Dates and Madonna Tour Dates at Vividseats.com! We sell Concert Tickets like Avril Lavigne Concert Tickets and Theater Tickets to the hottest shows, such as The Lion King and Wicked.
Nov.20.2008 The November 20 Hot Link Orgy
The hottest orgy with piggies on a boat
Yet another reason not to befriend a fat woman, let alone bring her on your boat
-Maxim’s newest Hometown Hottie is indeed hot and breasty
-Could pole dancing be coming to the Olympics? (with eye opening sexy video)
-Jennifer Ellison attempts to cover her huge boobs with her hands
-Here’s how not to pass out (funny pic)
-Hilarious college pranks (video)
-Blake Lively has cleavage
-A collection of awesome homeless man signs (funny pics)
-Warner Bros tells the town of Batman, Turkey to fuck off (funny video)
-A hot Denver Nuggets cheerleader
-The 10 hottest moments in Scarlett Johansson history
-How to teach your girl to fuck like a porn star
-Eva Longoria upskirt
-5 Celebrity scandals that are actually interesting
-More on Karolina Kurkova’s lack of a belly button (plus other Victoria’s Secret girls in bikinis)
-Saluting the retarded workers of Dunkin Donuts (funny pic)
-Emanuelle Chriqui at GQ’s Men of the Year
-Cat rides a Roomba (adorable video)
Nov.18.2008 Scarlett Johansson is an attractive woman in Allure
From behind the scenes of her photo shoot for the new issue of Allure…
Seriously, just look at her. Scarlett Johansson is a modern miracle. Though honestly, if I were a woman reading Allure, I’d be like, “Get this fucking bitch out of my face” because there’s no way to compete with her. You’re practically a different species than she is. It’s like if you tried to play basketball against robots on pogo sticks or trying to make someone vomit faster than a picture of Sarah Jessica Parker.
It’s not an exaggeration when I say that I’d eat peanut M&Ms out of Scarlett’s ass. I’d even eat stuff I don’t like out of there, like peas or spoiled salmon or Ryan Reynolds’ cum. Really, whatever’s there, I’d take. This may be more of a reflection of my lack of clean dishes than desire for her, but still, it’s something.
Sep.30.2008 The 9 best Jewish things
It’s Rosh Hashanah today, also known as the Jewish New Year. What does that mean (other than that your Jewish coworker, Schmeckel, shouldn’t be off on December 31st or January 1st)? It means it’s a time to look at a few of my favorite Jewish things!
Home decor: Menorah
How do you improve upon a candle? BY MAKING SEVEN OF THEM IN ONE! Man, that’s clever. The “more is more” philosophy is also pretty in line with America’s, I’d say.
Societal convention: Circumcision
Have you seen an uncircumcised penis? It’s all hooded and shady looking. Looks kind of like one of the police drawings of the Unabomber.
Enemy: Mel Gibson
Good to see his hatred for the Jewish people didn’t force him out of a prominent starring roles in Hollywood. *looks at IMDB page… Oh.
Half-Jewess: Scarlett Johansson
She’s allegedly half-Jewish and now married to a Canadian in Ryan Reynolds. If she were full-Jewish, they would have been married six months ago, she’d be done acting, and they’d currently be at Marshalls looking for a good deal on home goods.
Sep.29.2008 The September 29 Hot Link Orgy
The hottest orgy with rolling faces full of crotch
Trying this with a guy friend of yours might have much less sexy results
-Naked go-karting? Sure, why not!
-Shocker: The 2008 Playboy model of the year is quite attractive
-Audrina Patridge is drunk, wet, and in a saucy bikini
-Jets tailgating features a car blowing up (w/ video)
-Kimberly Holland is pretty in her lingerie
-Gemma Atkinson has a 2009 bikini calendar
-Safe-for-Work porn is fun (w/ video)
-The latest Sarah Palin/SNL skit was solid (w/ video)
-…but people are trying to take advantage of her with Sarah Palin porn (w/ photographic evidence)
-Some hot chicks came out to the NBA Live 09 debut party
-Brett Favre’s top 10 sidekicks (I hate him)
-Reminder: Scarlett Johansson has boobs
-…which are now married to Ryan Reynolds
-MILF ATTACK!!!!
Aug.05.2008 Scarlett Johansson isn’t good at see-through dresses
From the premiere of something called Vicky Cristina Barcelona, which is either a period film or the unveiling of my housekeeper comes Scarlett Johansson in this lovely ensemble.
Granted I’m not a stylist or anything, in spite of how awesome I look everyday, but I have to question the logic of wearing a see-through dress and then having a huge grandma bra underneath it. Is that supposed to imply class? Or are you simply aspiring to take your milky skin and curvy figure to the complete Victorian extreme by wearing the least sexy bra you can find? Note to all the women out there: If you’re going to wear a see-through dress, commit to it. If there’s one thing I can’t stand, it’s half-assing it. Go big or go home. Especially if it involves showing off oversized breasts. Actually, only if it involves that. I could probably care less if you don’t try in any other aspect of life. In fact, I’d be disappointed in you if you aspire to be anything other than a set of boobs.
Man, I’m going to be an awesome father to a little girl some day.
Jul.02.2008 Ashlee simpson pregnant, large-breasted, kind of retarded looking
From..I dunno, a farm let’s say.
I have many problems with this image. For one, pregnant nipples: I don’t know whether to suckle them for eroticism or hunger. Two, what is that shit on her head? It’s like a rope or some sort of Native American princess crown. And three, she’s huge. Isn’t she like…a month pregnant? She’s built like a hippopotamus who is not only hungry, but also hungry. Ugh. Babies. Stop ravishing the youth of my starlets. YOU STAY THE FUCK AWAY FROM SCARLETT JOHANSSON . SO HELP ME. SHE’S NOT BUILT TO BOUNCE BACK FROM SUCH THINGS.
[More images at Egotastic]
