Sometimes I like to put together random memes to come up with a post idea. Look no further than this post…list + sexy girls + visual sport + people getting hurt + video = GREATEST THING EVER ON INTERNET? Probably not. I’d need kitties doing cute things to round it out. But we’ll try anyway. For your Random YouTube Fetish pleasure…this week, girls play dodgeball for amusement, attention, and YouTube views.

This first one comes from a site of hot chicks doing extreme sports called XXtreeme.com (sort of SFW, theoretically). I think you have to reward people who really stick to a niche.

This one sort of looks like my apartment on Friday nights in which I make the women compete in gladiator-esque fights to the death for the rights to be romanced by me. Only this is with actual women instead of stuffed animals.

This one is from something called MILFmania, created by some rock station in Orlando. I’m not going to say that this is the greatest rock station ever, but it’s probably the greatest rock station ever. Yes I can get my “rock block” and my “Get the Led Out Tuesdays” from any K-Rock or whatever around the country. But can I get MILFs playing beach dodgeball at all of those? DOUBTFUL. Who cares that they probably haven’t been fertile since Quiet Riot was culturally relevant?

Stripper dodgeball is, well, exactly what it sounds. In this crazy work-a-day world, who has time for false advertisement? Skip to 1:45 in to save yourself from the rest of the Spike TV nonsense.

Skip all the way to the end for this one. “There isn’t much hotness in this one,” you say. Well, if it’s wrong to find a woman getting knocked unconscious to the floor by a rubber ball “hot”, then I don’t want to be right. Or convicted. Note: She totally didn’t actually break her neck like the video claims. A dodgeball hurts, sure, but you’d have to be made of Teddy Grahams to get bones broken by one.

BONUS: The sexiest video of all perhaps. Big boobs, bikinis, balls flying. Too bad it’s all dudes. But hey, if you take that out of the equation…niiiiiice.

I’m pretty good at video games so you can imagine my dismay when I see gentlemen playing one incorrectly. For example, Guitar Hero is a game where you pretend to be a guitar player and sort-of mimic guitar movements. Conversely, these guys hit each other in the groin with a guitar. I’m not sure they understand the premise of the game.

I guess I can be accused of the same though. When I got Hungry Hungry Hippos..oh boy…you should have SEEN the mouthfucking those hippos got. Don’t tell me you’re hungry if you’re not willing to pay the price. Damn misleading hippos. You knew what this was about.

I don’t want to spoil this video for you, but it’s one of the most amazing things I’ve ever seen. If you’re a fan of DuckTales or ever wanted to swim in gold coins like Scrooge McDuck (side note: it’s physically impossible and hurts quite a bit when you dive in).

BONUS - A different kind of creepy alternate intro for Golden Girls. All Hail Gingerbread Bea Arthur:

Best things you’ll see all day. Guaranteed. Or your money back. But you paid none. So too bad baby.

After the amazingness that was a chick getting knockeddafuckout by some dude, I received an email from our friends at Going Like Sixty with this video of people getting punched in the face in slow mo.

It’s mind-boggling what people can do in the name of art. Punching people in the face as they do silly things, wiping feces in the form of religious icon, it’s just so absurd. I may have missed my calling in life. Sigh, one day my dream of a Voltron made entirely of aborted fetuses will come to fruition. Dream big or go home, that’s my motto.

Of course I don’t advocate punching women in the face but HOLY SHIT HOW AWESOME IS IT WHEN A WOMAN GETS PUNCHED IN THE FACE?!??!

It looks like a viral marketing video or a fake of some sort, but I’m not sure what it would accomplish to that end. Unless you’re trying to sell me on the idea of punching fat girls in the face. To which I say both “Preach on, brotha” and “Too late.”