Oct.31.2008 Fat girls more likely to have sex than non-fatties
A new study has shaken the foundations of science and sexuality, primarily due to the shift of fat women rushing to hand in their surveys. A new study shows that fat chicks are more likely to be getting laid than thin ones.
Overweight women are more likely to report having sex with men than women considered to be of “normal weight,” U.S. researchers said.
The study is based on data from the 2002 National Survey of Family Growth, which looked at sexual behavior of more than 7,000 U.S. women.
“These results were unexpected and we don’t really know why this is the case,” Kaneshiro said in a statement.
Ninety-two percent of overweight women reported having a history of sexual intercourse with a man, as opposed to 87 percent of women with a normal body mass index.
In fairness, BMI is kind of a dumb way of measuring if someone’s fat or not. If a girl has great big sexy boobs, she’ll probably be over her recommended BMI too. And, as we all know, every attractive woman with big breasts is a complete whore. I can’t accept that porn’s lied to me over the years, it would destroy my whole world view.
But yeah, let’s assume that this really is about real fat women. Like fat women whom you could see and go, “Wait, that thing is a person? I just assumed you were a pile of mashed potatoes that gained autonomy and a willingness to move.” If that’s the case, and I pray to all the gods that it isn’t, then I am ashamed for all of you. Yes, we’ve all wanted to fuck the Michelin Man at some point in our lives. Doesn’t make it right.
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Oct.31.2008 Quote of the Day
A priest in Queens was using a confessional to pick up bitches. SUCCESSFULLY.
Laufer says his client, Judith Rodriguez-Lytwyn was vulnerable when she walked into the confessional where [the priest, Father Elvis] Elano allegedly told her, “Your presence struck me like a thunderbolt.”
The two soon starting dating.
“They became intimate, engaging in sex,” says Laufer.
When Fr. Elvis left the building, he’d head to Rodriguez-Lytwyn’s home, where the two carried on a seven-month affair, one that had parishioners stunned.
“I can’t believe it. You know it knocks me for a loop,” said Dan Torpey, one of the church’s parishioners.
[via]
Oct.31.2008 Mariah Carey is fighting fires while half naked
From her Halloween party in NYC…
See now this is why celebrities are silly. Yes, that’s an awesome authentic costume, it really looks like a firefighter’s uniform. But there’s no way she can fight fires like that. She’d get burned as soon as she approaches the flames! She knows NOTHING about fire safety. In fact, if a real firefighter dressed like that, they’d probably get a citation for improper wardrobe at work! These celebrities, man. No respect for anything.
She’d also have to be very careful near the flames since her stomach would catch fire pretty quickly. Oh, that’s not a whale blubber corset? Oh.
Oct.31.2008 The October 31 Hot Link Orgy
The hottest orgy with shaved eyebrows
Don’t ever make important eyebrow decisions when drunk
-An awesome collection of girls in slutty Halloween costumes
-..but not quite as slutty as hot girls with painted on costumes
-5 movies and TV shows this election has ruined forever
-The Hadron collider blows Audrina Patridge’s mind (video)
-Complete iPhone fail (funny picture)
-Best Halloween video ever? Perhaps (funny video)
-Denise Milani is exploding out of a pink top
-YOU NEED TO SEE THIS VIDEO (It involves Hamsters and a Piano)
-Olivia Munn interviews herself about wearing bikinis (sexyyyy)
-10 appearances by porn stars in mainstream movies
-Father gives kid gun, kid shoots him (video)
-Pro: Slutty Halloween
-The 13 worst mythical creatures
-A thin line between costume success and failure
-Heidi Klum has got milk
-Vikki Blows has a phenomenal 2009 calendar
-Five video games chicks can play
-Serious book report fail (funny picture)
Oct.31.2008 Sega’s old advertising leaves something to be desired
So, I’m no advertising expert, but I think this ad for the old Sega Genesis (in the UK, so it’s called the Megadrive) isn’t a double entendre. Hell, it’s barely even a single entendre.
On the plus side, the ad definitely knows its audience of gamers: Chronic masturbators who need to distract themselves from their fleshy bodies without deviating too far from the masturbation formula.
Ironically, the motions presented in the ad were the same way you could defeat Dr. Robotnik in real life. You just move that joystick around for a couple pumps and he just groans, rolls over, and never talks to you again. Believe me, I know.
Oct.31.2008 Kim Kardashian looks kinda hot as Wonder Woman
From some bullshit event where celebrities wear costumes in advance of Halloween so people write about them on Halloween.
I hate to say it because I think she’s kind of ridiculously overrated as a “hot chick” but she looks pretty fucking good in this costume. It really accentuates everything that needs to be accentuated and hides everything that doesn’t need to be accentuated (for example, the black spandex hides the neverending train of black cock going inside of her). I wholeheartedly approve.
Then again, you could probably dress any sub-150 pound girl in a Wonder Woman costume and you’d be like “Yeahhhh lasso me up baby.” I’m pretty sure that even if Cloris Leachman threw the costume on I’d be like “Mmmm I like dat. Tell me mo’ about about dat Great Depression boo.”
Oct.30.2008 Lindsay Lohan rides the subway. Like a savage
Lindsay Lohan and gal pal (I sound like a real gossiper!) Samantha Ronson were in NYC yesterday.
This is what happens in a tough economy guys. Hot chicks shouldn’t be riding the train. They just shouldn’t. The train is for average Joes and ethnic minorities beatboxing. All the attractive women take cabs or magical unicorns who sing pop songs while escorting them to their destination.
I guess she might have been doing it ironically. She probably heard “run to the train” and got on her back all excited with her mouth open then had to be told that the train wasn’t running on her. Oh, the disappointment in her eyes would break your soul.
