Feb.26.2007 Sometimes you only want to read the headline
In the world I like to call “Making the funny” or more accurately “Attempting to make-a the funny,” it can often be difficult to find entertaining content that hasn’t been covered a million times. Yes, Britney Spears shaving her head is hilarious and cringe-inducing, but what can I really offer you about her retroactively destroying my countless hours of masturbation that you hadn’t read? So I always strive to bring about something you might miss, something that might fly under your radar before someone else does at least once per day, often more.
You can imagine my excitement seeing this headline:
Bobby Brown arrested at cheerleading competition
Like a child at Christmas, I dream about the possibilities. Did he disrobe at a high school competition? Did he punch his new girlfriend? Did he run in, steal a girl’s pom-poms and grind them up, then cook them in a spoon?
The reality is, do you really want to know? Whatever happened there, could it possibly top that headline? The unlimited possibilities. From there, it could only be a letdown. So, to you, dear reader, I say, just leave it at the headline for now. Let’s laugh at Bobby Brown’s drug and spousal abuse problems and not get caught up in the semantics of reality.
And for those of you spoil sports out there, the story of what happened is after the jump. I won’t click through to see it, I WON’T EVEN LOOK AS I PASTE IT IN. But if you want to, go ahead.
CANTON, Massachusetts (AP) — For the second time in a year, Bobby Brown has been arrested while in town to watch his daughter at a cheerleading competition.
Brown was picked up at Attleboro High School on Sunday night on a warrant for failing to appear at a child support hearing in October.
The 38-year-old singer was scheduled to appear Monday afternoon in Norfolk Probate and Family Court, said Adam Loomis of All State Constables in Weymouth.
“He was supposed to show up and prove everything was up-to-date,” Loomis said.
In October, Brown paid $11,000 in delinquent child support after being threatened with arrest if he stepped back into Massachusetts. He owed over two months of payments to Kim Ward, of Stoughton, the mother of two of his two children. It wasn’t immediately known if Brown still owes child support.
Brown was cooperative outside the high school, and borrowed Loomis’ cell phone to arrange to get out of jail, the constable said.
Brown’s attorney, Atlanta-based Phaedra Parks, didn’t immediately return a call to comment. A message also was left at the Probate and Family Court.
Okay I cheated and read it. Bobby Brown actually sounds like a sort of caring parent from this. That’s wackier than the headline led me to believe.
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