Oct.25.2007 Scarlett’s kind of a creep
When I think of the beautiful things Scarlett Johansson can give me from her body, I can’t help but giggle with overwhelming joy. But Ryan Reynolds got something extremely special…her wisdom tooth.
“She’d just had her wisdom teeth removed, so she had one dipped in gold and strung on a necklace for him,” says Desk Ouch!, who ran to us with the goss, practically hyperventilating with the nitrous-oxide-laced looniness. Nasty. Who do these two think they are, Angelina and Billy Bob or something?
What’s next? For Scar’s birthday, Nov. 22 (she’s a rebel Sag, love it!), will Ry have one of his turds bronzed and put in a little, or big, Cartier box? ‘Cause heaven knows it ain’t gonna be a ring, not with these two heart-crushers.
Publicist P.S.: Scarlett’s press rep says the va-va-voomer wasn’t able to throw her b-f a pah-tay, as she’s been outta town. When we pressed, saying our sources insisted the toothy soiree was an early B-day bash, the repper replied, “She gave him a gift this weekend in private. There was no one else there.”
Honestly, I don’t care that she’s Scarlett Johansson. If she gave me a golden tooth for my birthday present, I’d probably throw it at her and ask her if she thinks I’m the tooth fairy. Then I’d cry because, growing up, I always wanted to be the tooth fairy. But with great power comes great responsibility.
Actually, that’s a lie. She could take a sh*t in an expensive pair of my jeans as a birthday present and I’d probably just flip my hair and go, “Golly Scarlett what a swell gift.” And I’d just walk around in them because, hey, she’s hot. And she eats a lot of fibers and corn apparently.
[...] chris put an intriguing blog post on Scarlettâ