Aug.01.2008 Paparazzi may need to chill the fuck out in LA
Los Angeles is overrun by two types of insects: celebrities and paparazzi. Since one group is perceived as awesome and the other is perceived as scum and the sides can’t seem to get along, clearly one has to go.
A city task force convened Thursday morning to tackle a serious public safety threat that has resulted in broken toes, beach brawls and, apparently, the unfortunate trend of movie stars naming their children after fruit.
The perpetrators: ravenous bands of paparazzi. The proposed solution: new laws to rein them in.
Earlier this year, City Councilman Dennis Zine proposed an “anti-paparazzi” ordinance that would protect celebrities and the public from aggressive paparazzi by creating a “personal safety zone,” between the photographers and their subjects. On Thursday, task force members, including representatives from the cities of West Hollywood, Beverly Hills, Malibu and Calabasas; actors and singers; and Sheriff Lee Baca of Los Angeles County testified in City Hall about the issue.
The problem of aggressive photographers was framed as a matter of public safety (the photographers “travel in packs, run red lights and make unsafe U-turns,” said the mayor of Malibu, Pamela Ulich), economic hardship (it costs local police departments a lot of manpower to police Chez Spears) and personal privacy (“My biggest concern about this issue is my right to say no,” said the actor Milo Ventimiglia).
This inability to say no is a pretty big deal to Milo. For example, when someone said, “Wouldn’t you love to get into that underaged costar of yours Hayden Panettiere?” and “You should do it, she’s right there…statutory rape laws be damned!” clearly he was incapable of saying no. It’s all the paparazzi’s fault!
Not to play devil’s advocate, but I think paparazzi make the world way more awesome. I never have to deal with them or even see them, yet they harass people who are more successful than I am and often get photos of their boobs. If anything, we should force celebrities into gallows and make them be photographed. With their shirts off. Niiiiiice.
[Also how will I ever see Kim Kardashian, pictured above, again? Not like she ever does anything noteworthy other than parade her big ass for paparazzi to photograph. Sigh, the man is always harshing my buzz.l]
[...] Paparazzi may need to chill out in LA [Blog of Hilarity] [...]