Mysterious, unquantifiable noise annoys couple

Jul.24, 2008 in News to Amuse

An elderly couple in Green Bay has been troubled by a repetitive noise for the past two years. The problem is, no one else can hear it.

Bob and Leona Ehrfurth say the noise that’s been plaguing them for two years sounds something like a rumbling motor, with a subtle vibration that won’t quit. Then it stops — especially when they try to show city officials or acoustic experts what they’re hearing.

It’s enough to keep 76-year-old Leona from sleeping.

“It’s like there’s a semi parked right outside with the engine running, but when you look out, there isn’t one,” she said.

She and her husband, who is 75, have lived in the same house for 42 years. The problem only developed over the last two years.

Her husband can sleep through it but also finds it irritating.

“It doesn’t matter if the windows are open or closed — you still hear it,” he said. “It’s worse in the winter.”

When they leave, the don’t hear the noise, he said, so they know it’s not some health problem the two share.

City officials hired a company for $1,000 worth of testing in the house this spring, but the tester came up with no noise and no significant vibration.

Not some health problem they both share? I disagree. It’s a very serious health problem affecting millions of the elderly across the globe. That problem? The cold breath of sweet lady Death sneaking up behind you. Except you’re old, so it doesn’t really have to sneak any more. It can probably run. And jump around the house. And play hopscotch. And then if it tried to talk to you, you’d be all like “WHA? GERTIE, THIS SKELETON GENTLEMAN IS WHISPERING TOO QUIETLY,” even when Death is yelling. It kind of takes the joy out of it, I’d assume.