Jul.09.2007 Man dresses like tree, robs bank, is douchebag
When I think of great ideas on how to rob a bank, I think putting leaves on myself. Then I think walking right in front of a camera.
Just as the Citizen Bank branch opened Saturday morning, a man walked in with leafy boughs duct-taped to his head and torso, and robbed the place.
“He really went out on a limb,” police Sgt. Ernie Goodno said Sunday.
Police said the leafy man didn’t saying anything about having a weapon, just demanded cash, and was given an undisclosed amount.
HAHA DID HE REALLY GO OUT ON A LIMB OFFICER? OW MY SIDES. You should be a comedian Sergeant Goodno. Your name even works for it. Was your joke good? No.
Also what kind of idiots didn’t stop him in the first place? His costume was so great. If I saw a tree walking towards my teller window, I think I’d say, “Hey guys, this tree looks up to no good.” Trees shouldn’t be walking. They may yell at you sometimes, demanding you kill your parents when alone in the woods as a child, but they definitely do not walk. I say this from personal experience.
Derby Tip to astute reader Carlos, who’s arguably my number 1 fan
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