From some hot dog place in California…

This is like finding out that not only does Santa Clause not exist, but that the man with the flowing white beard who used to appear in my house and eat all my cookies was not only having sex with my mom, but also draining my college funds, shitting in my bathroom and not flushing, and facefucking me while I dreamed of that awesome new Nintendo game. I hear in this game there are pixel-y graphics and you jump on things! It’s a real keeper!

[WWTDD is owed gratitude]

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