Apr.24.2008 POLYGAMYGATE: So what about those polygamy sect kids
We’ve been all over the sexy…tragic story of the Polygamy sect in Texas being broken up by the Feds. But now that things are being cleaned up, what about the kids?
Many of the children have seen little or no television. They have been essentially home-schooled all their lives. Most were raised on garden-grown vegetables and twice-daily prayers with family. They frolic in long dresses and buttoned-up shirts from another century. They are unfailingly polite.
The 437 children taken from the polygamist compound in West Texas are being scattered to group homes and boys’ and girls’ ranches across the state, plunged into a culture radically different from the community where they and their families shunned the outside world as a hostile, contaminating influence on their godly way of life.
The state Child Protective Services program said it chose foster homes where the youngsters can be kept apart from other children for now.
“We recognize it’s critical that these children not be exposed to mainstream culture too quickly or other things that would hinder their success,” agency spokeswoman Shari Pulliam said. “We just want to protect them from abuse and neglect. We’re not trying to change them.”
Yeah these kids are fucked. It’s probably for the best if we just like burn them all alive or send them to Switzerland or something. It’s hard to imagine some of them, especially the older ones, being deprogrammed enough to be contributing members of society. I mean, yeah the girls would make great wives because I could basically treat them like a rabid wolf that I have sex with (and that bakes me delicious Polygamy Pies! Multiple flavors combined into one delicious cakey crust! Get yours now!). Chained up and totally bending to my will. So appealing.
I guess so long as the government doesn’t go with my “burn them alive” strategy, these kids will have a far better deal. I mean, TV alone is probably worth the price of admission. And yeah, if you’re a boy, you’re not going to be the alpha male of the world like you would have been in the sect. But you also don’t have to see your sister get diddled by a 40 year-old wearing an Amish beard and a stupid hat to protect his dumb reddened skin from the sun. So I guess it evens out. Ugh and with all that farming and shit, the guy probably has really meaty knuckles too. And there’s no way he’s just using one finger either; they never just use one…it’s in their Wacky Magic Bible or whatever they call their scripture. Sigh. Dirty dirty polygamists.
Wait polygamists do farm and shit too right? I mean, I know they use electricity, but I assume if you have a huge ass compound, there’s some agriculture going on. Eh, fuck em.
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