Mar.19.2008 Sarah Jessica Parker hates your honesty
Sarah Jessica Parker was named the Unsexiest Woman in the World by Maxim a couple months back. Well now, she’s taking the time to be mad about it.
Sarah Jessica Parker says that both she and her husband, Matthew Broderick, were equally upset when they learned that Maxim had voted the Sex & The City star the “unsexiest woman in the world.”
“It’s so brutal in a way, so filled with rage and anger,” SJP, 43, told Grazia magazine. “It upset him [Matthew], because it has to do with his judgment too.”
The men’s mag, which voted her No. 1 over runners-up Amy Winehouse, Grey’s Anatomy’s Sandra Oh, Madonna and Britney Spears, likened the golden advertising goddess to a horse.
“Do I have big fake boobs, Botox and big lips? No. Do I fit some ideals and standards of some men writing in a men’s magazine? Maybe not. Am I really the unsexiest women in the world? Wow! It’s kind of shocking… It’s condemnation, it’s insane. What can I do? I guess you can’t please all people.”
“Do I look like a horse? Absolutely.”
In the interest of fairness, she’s probably not really the Unsexiest Woman in the World. There are women who have like flippers for hands and shit and if they were to touch you, you would instantaneously vomit on your shoes (or stomach depending upon your level of fitness, I suppose). But as far as celebrities go, she kind of looks like something my cat would vomit up after a passionate night of crotch licking. And that’s not what I want from my celebrity women. I want to escape in their beauty. Not get a reminder of how unfair life is because one of the preeminent females responsible for shaping a generation of women looks like she was crafted out of a witch’s rotting corpse mixed with a healthy dose of HGH.
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