The latest reasons I wish my roommate did intravenous drugs with Freddie Mercury…

Last Wednesday, I came home to find that my roommate had packed up all his stuff and it looked he left. Turns out, he didn’t. I saw him that night. I then told my roommate that I would be moving out March 15th. He told me he would be going back to Europe the following day because A) his grandmother was dying, B) his cancer, and C) he needed to address his visa issues.

We now sit here one week later and he’s prancing around, leaving more wig hair than ever in the sink. I don’t even address him any more. He’s the sketchiest human being I’ve ever met. Which is no small feat.